That old feeling

 

Mmmm…espresso.  The perfect little pick me up.  I read once that drinking coffee with another person increases your fondness towards that person.  What if you are by yourself?  I’m not sure, but drinking espresso by myself makes me feel fonder towards life in general.  I’m rolling my eyes at myself.

This morning I woke up feeling like I didn’t have enough time.  The feeling was focused on nothing in particular, but, in general, there’s not enough time in the day to [fill in the blank].  I tend to get this kind of feeling when I feel bogged down with things to do, and when I feel anxious in general.  I really have felt less anxious since stepping back in time two weeks ago when we moved to the country.  But, today, for some reason, that old feeling was creeping up on me.  I often try to get rid of it by proving it wrong.  “I do so have enough time.  Look how productive I will be today!”  I don’t recommend trying to beat the feeling that way.  I woke up at 7:00 a.m. to see Gregg off to his first day of work (woo hoo!).  I fiddled around the house for awhile getting ready to leave the house for my errand running.  I was tired by 8:25, unable to escape my, “there’s not enough time” feeling.  I got back in bed.  I think this actually is the solution to rid myself of this enemy feeling.  Rest.  Stop.

I consider this a step toward Team Grace.  A step away from Team Shame.